I just realized that there is nothing left to do for now. There won’t be another shot (I had 6 yesterday), there won’t be another acupuncture treatment (I had 2 just this week), there won’t even be any more water to drink before they remove my eggs and make my babies. It’s crazy when you think about it. Tomorrow, in a lab, they’re going to make my babies, and all I can do at this point is pray, that just 1 of them will end up as a part of our family.
The reality is that the only thing I can really do during this whole process is pray. Of course I will do everything I can to contribute to the chances of our success but God will give me a baby how, when and if.
During my last retrieval my therapist recommended I have a verse or a mantra or something to focus on the morning of. I chose, Psalms 139:16 “Your eyes saw my embryo, and on your scroll every day was written that was being formed for me, before any one of them had yet happened.” I thought about the plans God had for my babies and remembered that He is in control and prayed that one of those embryos had a long and happy life written on that scroll. This retrieval, I’m going to be thinking of another verse as well, Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. God wants to bless me, and I’m going to go into that operating room with a crown of blessing on my head.
Every time I go through this I get a little nervous about going in and being put under. My daughter tonight did not want me to leave her in her room and so I picked her up, sang a million songs to her and rocked her until she was almost asleep [sometimes the tools from sleep training class don’t apply]. God is reminding me why I go through all this. God gave me this desire to have children and I know, one way or another, He will provide.
I'll go first 
Just read all your entries. I will be praying for you tomorrow. You are so strong. Love you.
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